I woke up screaming “EUREKA!” in the middle of last night, because in my sleep I had discovered the perfect solution to an international problem.
It goes like this: -
I understand that in certain parts of the US there are excellent private woodland and mountain training camps for those who tend towards having deeply red necks and a patriotic wish to defend their country against all real or imagined threats, including muskrats and certain politicians.
Furthermore, there is a massive gun lobby in the country, which is apparently well trained in the use of fire-arms. Altogether, it’s estimated that there are well in excess of five million such persons who are itching to blast the living fuck out of something other than their usual quarry of artificial targets, occasional criminal ‘runners’, innocent civilians in shopping malls or schools and the odd politician.
In addition, there are seemingly many thousands of really brave ‘hunters’ of many nationalities who currently travel the world with high-powered rifles and whose aim is to find even more innocent wildlife alongside which they may pose for photographs once they’ve been shot from a safe distance and their victim is accordingly harmless.
Perhaps regrettably, the latter group does not tend to shoot politicians.
Notwithstanding, let us invite ALL of the above groups to present themselves, with their fowling pieces, rifles and other civilian ordnance, at some massive Texan air-base for parachute training.
Then, and once trained, let us provide them with boots and quantities of ammunition appropriate to their fowling pieces etc., before dropping them onto identified terrorist targets wherever they are in the world, with orders to shoot every living thing they can find and take photographs if they feel so inclined.
With luck, utilisation of such a force will result in a severe depletion of personnel on both sides, thus ridding the world of some very nasty aromas.
Sensible suggestions for acronymic titles of the force are invited.
Quad erat demonstrandum ……..