Ted and Sam, two friends, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems.
One day Ted didn’t show up. Sam didn’t think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something. But after Ted hadn’t shown up for a week or so, Sam really got worried. However, since the only time they ever got together was at the park, Sam didn’t know where Ted lived, so he was unable to find out what had happened to him.
A month had passed, and Sam figured he had seen the last of Ted, but one day, Sam approached the park and - lo and behold! - there sat Ted!
Sam was very excited and happy to see him and told him so. Then he asked him,
“For crying out loud Ted, what in the world happened to you?”
Ted replied, “I’ve been in jail.”
“Jail” cried Sam. “What in the world for?”
“Well” Ted said, “you know Cindy, that cute little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where I sometimes go?”
“Yeah,” said Sam, I remember her. What about her?”
“Well, one day she filed rape charges against me, and at 89 years old, I was so proud when I got into court, I pleaded ‘Guilty’ and the judge gave me 30 days for perjury.”